How to Manage Out of Control Toddler Screen Time

 

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Guest Blogger

Every now and again I love to have guest bloggers post on Journey to SAHM. It gives a new perspective on parenting and just our every day lives.

Veronika wrote up this amazing article about managing out of control toddler screen time that I couldn’t wait to share with you! Technology is something we can all relate to and she does a great job explaining the ins and outs of what screen time should really look like.

 

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How to Manage your Out of Control Toddler Screen Time: Recommendations from the AAP that is GOLD

 

Toddler screen time is one of the subjects that creates the most conflict between me and my toddler. Practically daily I have a conversation that goes something like this:

Toddler- “Can I watch YouTube?”

Me- “No.”

Toddler- “Ok. Can I play on my tablet?”

Me- “No.”

Toddler- “Can I watch a movie?”

Me- “No.”

Toddler- “Can I get on my X-Box?”

Me- “NO! NO! NO!”

You get the idea. If it’s not the TV it’s the tablet, laptop, desktop, phone, or smartwatch. Kids are bombarded with things fighting for their attention, and many are utter time-wasters. Sometimes it feels like a win-win.

I get the dishes done while my daughter stares endlessly at kids reviewing toys on YouTube. It’s garbage, but it keeps her quiet, so I can do my thing. The problem is I also need to fold laundry.

Add another hour of toddler screen time. Then I need to work on my blog, and volunteer work and prepare for a lesson I’m teaching in my church. Not to mention the endless vacuuming, mopping, scrubbing, and sanitizing that needs to be done.

Let me keep her quiet just a little bit longer! Sound familiar? Needless to say, you can always find an excuse to give your toddler screen time.

And unfortunately, the verdict is out that excessive screen-time has a host of negative effects. The question is how do you get out of an unhealthy cycle?

Ask The Experts

Thankfully the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) has updated its screen-time guidelines to be more tailored to each family.

It’s finally acknowledging that an hour of Grand Theft Auto with your four-year-old is not the same as an hour of Daniel Tiger’s Neighborhood (a show I honestly have no limit on with my kid; it is gold).

The main recommendations are:

• • For children younger than 18 months, avoid the use of screen media other than video-chatting.

• • When introducing your toddler to screen time, choose high-quality programming (*cough* Daniel Tiger *cough*) and watch it with your child to help him understand what he’s seeing.
  • Typically screen time at 2 and under slows language development, but co-viewing it with your child can decrease this negative effect. Treat it like you would a book with a young child using dialogue like, “What do you see? What do you think is going to happen next? What do you think he is feeling? Why?”
  • For children ages, 2 to 5 years, limit screen use to 1 hour per day of high-quality programs. Parents again should co-view media with their children.
• • For children ages 6 and older, place consistent limits on the time spent using media, and the types of media, and make sure media does not take the place of adequate sleep, physical activity and other behaviors essential to health. Designate media-free times together as well as media-free locations at home. Have ongoing communication about online safety and treating others with respect online and offline.

 

What I find most helpful about these new guidelines is the flexibility. It does not say, never watch after 7, or never watch at the dinner table. Every family is different.

Maybe dinnertime for your family is at the table at 5 PM on the dot, or dinnertime is when you all watch a program together and munch on the couch (the former being preferable here). Maybe your kid goes to bed at 6 PM or 10 PM because of your spouse’s work schedule.

 

 

Your Plan to Reduce Toddler Screen Time

There are plenty of resources out there to keep your kids away from a TV screen. The book The Toddler’s Busy Book: 365 Creative Games and Activities to Keep Your 1 1/2- to 3-Year-Old Busy has an incredible list of screen-free activities to keep your toddler occupied in other ways.

The AAP has also released a Family Media Plan that helps you create the right restrictions for your family and stick to them.

Many parents (like me) allow bad habits with screentime to happen because they simply have not thought through important questions such as When and where is screentime acceptable? Should my toddler’s screen time be the same as my other children? What can they view or not view? What do they know about internet safety? What should I do if my child breaks a rule about screentime?

Start by entering information about your family into the website linked above to get age-relevant recommendations. Then answer each question with your spouse and child and decide how you will handle the misuse of media in your home.

Print out the plan, hang it for all to see, and stick to it! Your child may be upset at some new rules initially but stand your ground! Once the standards become the norm, your child’s resistance will subside. 

Your child will create a pattern of screen-free time and find ways to replace it with other activities. You will likely need to direct them to new activities in the beginning before new habits are formed.

As the AAP recommends, revisit your plan now and then and reevaluate how it is going. Are there rules you are letting slide? Are there rules you need to add? Do you need the motivation to put down your own screen?

Then have the discussion again! Remember, your example matters. If you live a balanced life with a variety of healthy activities, your child will likely follow suit.

Try creating your own family media plan and let us know in the comments how it’s going! What did you prioritize? What will you do to keep consistency?

 

Meet Guest Blogger Veronika Tait

My name is Veronika Tait, creator of the psychology and life blog veronikatait.com.

I have a Ph.D. in Social Psychology from Brigham Young University and currently teach as an adjunct professor at two Utah universities.

As a mom of two, I am very passionate about parenting and relationships.  I gain a lot of my inspiration from the work of researchers such as John Gottman and BrenéBrown.  I also study decision making and rationality inspired by the profound work from Dan Ariely and Daniel Kahneman. This passion has bled into my interest in politics where I look at decision making and advocate for the ethical government through research and volunteer work.

My personal blog features research with a flair of storytelling including topics on relationships, parenting, data-driven politics, and mental health.  It aims to foster human connection and ensure all readers that they belong.

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